Athletes exercise self-control in all things; they do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we [do it to receive] an imperishable one. 1 Corinthians 9:25
Dear Friends in Christ,
In a little over a week, our older son, Alex, will be ordained a deacon in the Roman Catholic Church, in his case, part of the process toward the priesthood. He is already a professed brother in his religious order, similar to being a monk. Men and women in religious orders live lives that challenge so much of popular culture’s values. They are known for their vows of poverty, celibacy and obedience. You might say that these are rigorous versions of common virtues that we all should pursue: stewardship, chastity and humility. Such virtues oppose common forces that tend to corrupt us: money, sex and power, or as our prayer book sets out in the Baptismal liturgy: the world, the flesh and the devil.
What is it about these virtues that makes them important? Why are they so challenging? I would like to write about these virtues during Epiphany season—the season when we look for insights that help us grow closer to God. The first thing to note about these virtues (as for so many other virtues) is that they require something western culture (and human nature) passionately resists: restraint.
We don’t want to restrain ourselves; we don’t want to hold back our passions and desires. Desires and emotions are now treated as not part of us, but as who we are. This then justifies what feels at first like the easy path of letting our passions and desires control us. Theologians say that sins are ‘disordered loves,’ where we take God-given good things and we pursue them in the wrong way, to the wrong amount, at the wrong time, for the wrong purposes. We feed our hungers without restraint, but we find ourselves more hungry and more enslaved to our hunger in the end, stuck in a false sense of who we are.
In the face of such self-destructive cycles, God offers us freedom. God offers us the freedom to live balanced lives where the Holy Spirit forms and shapes our consciences, forms and shapes our desires to love what is good, and to live out that love in the wholeness that God intends for us. Can we embrace the restraint that is part of the path to that freedom?
Those in religious orders show us that money, sex and power do not have to rule us. When we give our lives to God, we find the true object of our desires, the one who sets us free for lives of wholeness and joy and generosity, walking more closely with God as we practice stewardship, chastity and humility. May God strengthen you with his grace for that journey.
Yours in Christ,
-Tom